Scene ll -- Three weeks later, the deck of the Sally Forth.  Marlow is weaving on his sail as a SAILOR approaches with a stack of newspapers.  He tells Marlow that it just came over the wireless that Sally has been sold and the new owner is expected aboard shortly.  Marlow tells him to tell the crew to pack their gear and await further orders.

        The unhappy sailor hands Marlow the London papers which just arrived, and exits. Marlow works his way through the stack reading the headlines and becoming first amused, then more and more agitated. 

      

MARLOW

"SEA CAPTAIN TOAST OF LONDON SOCIETY."  What's this?
"Captain Marlow of the schooner Sally Forth was invited
to be guest of honour at the home of the Ashley-
Bentleys."  Good grief!  They still haven't cracked
Moby's disguise.  What a clever fellow.  Oh, no!  "SEX
SYMBOL SENTENCED TO SIXTY DAYS."  Sixty days!  He'll
never survive.  I'd better get back up there and....

What's this?  "WHALE SEEN AT BUCKINGHAM PALACE."  At the
Palace?  "ROYAL PARDON FOR ROYAL FAVORITE."  "RUMOURS OF
ROYAL ROMANCE SPARK ECONOMIC RECOVER."  I can't believe
it.  "MAJOR OILFIELD DISCOVERED OFF ISLE OF WIGHT.  WILL
SHE OR WON'T SHE?"  (to audience)  Will she or won't she
what?   "HAVE THEY OR HAVEN'T THEY?"  They better not
have!  "ARE THEY OR AREN'T THEY"  Dammit, I'll kill the
bloody impostor.  Prepare the dinghy!  When’s the next
launch for London.  Damn! 

He hurls the shuttle overboard. There’s a thud and a cry.

MOBY

(OS)  Ouch!

MARLOW

Moby?

 

A moment later Marlow helps a slightly stunned whale aboard.  Moby’s nightshirt is frayed to the waist and his moustache is on crooked.  He’s very tipsy.

MOBY

(Fixing his moustache)

Tha's where it sticks on best, though these...hic...
whiskers have been dallying in fairer fields.

MARLOW

Spare me the details, perfidious whale.  And kindly
explain these.

(Holding up headlines)

MOBY

True, true, every lurid word true.  Marlow, for three
weeks I've done nothing but drink champagne and eat
potted shrimp, not one of which was as potted as I. Now
I'm off to the tropics.  The mating season is
just getting underway.  My cows await.  Hic!

MARLOW

In other words, you were just dallying with Virginia --
getting your act ready for the road, so to speak.

MOBY

And how!  (shuffles)  Miz Virginia, she pregnant.

MARLOW

Oh, the horror!  The horror!

MOBY

Don't worry, Marlow.  The gestation time for whale calves
is 12 months  You'll adjust to the situation by then.
Anyway, duty calls me southwards.

MARLOW

Duty!  You speak of something you know not of, venal
whale.  What about your duty to the queen?  How can you
run out on her at a time like this?

MOBY

Come off it Marlow.  You told me you couldn't get it up
for virgins.  So, you needed the ice broken.  Well, I
didn't just break the ice, I gave you the spring thaw!
Now it's up to you.

MARLOW

I also told you I couldn't make love to a woman who'd

been with another before me.
 

    MOBY

No.  You said, and I quote, "who'd been with a man before me.”

Marlow, I am not a man.

Marlow stands speechless, not seeing Virginia board the ship behind him.  The queen is dressed in white but wears a brilliant red sash.  Moby hastily sticks the moustache on Marlow’s  lip, embraces him and bids him goodbye.  Then he climbs out of Marlow’s sight over the rail, where the audience can still see him partly concealed.  The queen approaches Marlow.

QUEEN

Ah, Captain.  How long this day has seemed without you.

MARLOW

This...uh...day?

QUEEN

When you left our bed, I thought you intended to return

shortly, but you have come here, to prepare the ship.

MARLOW

Oh...er...yes.

 

He fingers the moustache and begins to understand the mistaken identity.

 

Well.  Yes.  Here we are.  On the ship.  How do you like

her?

QUEEN

Had I not been sure I'd like her, I'd not have bought

her.

MARLOW

Bought her?  Bought Sally?  Of course.  Bought Sallv.

Quite right.

(aside)

So now, my beloved queen, you possess everything of mine:

my heart, my command -- even my friend's calf is inside

you.

     QUEEN

I'm wondering what to christen her.  My ship must have a

name befitting a royal honeymoon vessel.

MARLOW

Honeymoon?

    QUEEN

All I need is a captain to sail her...and a man to wed me.

MARLOW

Would that I could be both captain and consort.  But

alas, a consort must be more than a mere mercantile

captain, and I am no more than that.

QUEEN

Titles can be arranged.  I have heard great things of

your seamanship.  Kneel, Captain Marlow, and with this

sword I will dub you Admiral of the Royal Navy.

MARLOW

My queen, do not tire your fair arm with so heavy and

useless a chore.  An admiral must have courage, and a

husband must have even more courage than an admiral.  I

lack this particular quality.

QUEEN

Do you?  I wonder.  Tell me. Captain, if the need arose,

would you make sacrifices for queen and country?

MARLOW

If called upon, I would lay down my life without hesitation.

QUEEN

Then I think the problem is not that you lack courage,

but that you have lacked a cause.  Kneel, Captain Marlow.

(Marlow kneels and she lays the sword

first on one shoulder, then the other.)

Arise Lord Marlow, Admiral of the Fleet.  But wait.

While you're down there, have you any questions?

MARLOW

Only one.  Virginia, will you marry me?

QUEEN

Yes.

(She extends her hand and Marlow rises,

touching it with his lips)

Well, now that that is settled, I have a question.

MARLOW

Ask me anything...uh...within reason. 

QUEEN

At some future date we will undoubtedly give an heir to

the English throne.  I was wondering what our baby might
be like.

MARLOW

Our baby?  Oh...uh...well...

(He holds his hands a foot apart)

It might be that long.

QUEEN

            (Holding her hands three feet apart)

Or even that long.

COMPANY

   (Holding their hands wide apart)

Or that long.

Their arms apart, Marlow and Virginia come together and embrace.

MARLOW

One thing is sure:  Our firstborn son will be....

COMPANY

The Prince of Whales!

 

The SAILORS have unwound Marlow's sail from the loom and pulled it up unfurled.  An enormous image of Moby and the words HMS MOBY tower over the stage.  Moby has disappeared from view, but as the COMPANY sings a variation on GOD SAVE THE QUEEN, masses of bubbles blow from OS.   It is MOBY'S spouting, and as the song ends, everyone waves goodbye to him as Marlow’s  theme rises.

                                                                         COMPANY

FINALE - THE WIND IS BLOWING FAIR

THE WIND IS BLOWING FAIR

THE SEA REACH WAITING IN THE EVENING LIGHT

AND SHOULD THE GODS ALLOW

WE'LL RIDE INTO THE OPEN SEA TONIGHT

WE'LL RIDE INTO THE OPEN SEA TONIGHT

  

FINAL CURTAIN

 

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